Saturday night, a table set for twelve, pressed tablecloths, and nobody walking in. At 9:15 p.m. the group is a no-show and isn't answering on WhatsApp either: you've lost the evening and you can't even name the thing — deposit, advance, penalty? In restaurants confusion reigns: many say deposit when they're asking for an advance, and vice versa. The difference isn't lawyer territory: it changes what you can keep if the customer disappears and what you have to give back.
Below is the distinction in practical terms, no legal advice: what an advance is and what a deposit is, when to ask for them (groups, weekends, holidays), how much to ask without making a scene, how to ask on WhatsApp with a ready-made line, and what to do — keep or refund — when someone doesn't show up.
Advance vs deposit: the difference that changes everything
An advance is a prepayment on the bill: the customer pays €10 now that you deduct from what they'll spend. It's always their money, it ends up in the bill, no drama. A deposit, instead, is a guarantee of the commitment: as a rule of thumb, if the person who booked pulls out without a reason you can keep it, and if the restaurant fails to keep its side it must be refunded (in some cases doubled). In everyday practice almost every venue uses the advance — simpler to explain and less confrontational: you ask for it, deduct it from the bill, and everyone goes home happy. The point is to always say exactly what you actually do, and say it up front, not at the register.
When to ask: groups, weekends and holidays
There's only one practical rule: ask where an empty table hurts the most. Groups of six or more, because a whole section of the dining room hangs on a single promise. Weekends, when the people left out have waited a week and the table can't be made up. Holidays — Christmas, New Year's Eve, Valentine's Day, the local festival — where a cancellation at 6 p.m. means empty chairs all night. On a Tuesday at 7:30 p.m., with a half-full room, leave it alone: it's just friction on a low risk. And above all, ask under the same conditions for everyone: the same rule for the group of friends and for the corporate dinner, or the first person who feels treated differently will remind you on Google.
How much to ask: numbers that don't make a scene
For groups, €10-20 per person is the range that filters without offending: on a bill of €35 per head it's a third of what they'll spend, not an extortion. For bigger group dinners — New Year's Eve, corporate events — you can go higher, but stay proportionate: whoever feels squeezed won't come back, whoever gets the logic sees a guarantee for themselves. The ready-made WhatsApp line: “For groups we ask for a deposit of €10 per person, deducted from the bill — I'll send you the payment link right away.” One line, no apologies, the link attached. Those who want to come pay in a minute; those who vanish at that request weren't coming anyway — and you find out before setting twelve covers.
When someone doesn't show up: keep or refund
It depends on what you asked for and how you said it. If you asked for an advance deducted from the bill, the honest practice is to refund it when the missed arrival has a real reason — an illness, a bereavement — and to keep it, or turn it into a voucher, when the group disappears without a word. A deposit asked as a guarantee, on the other hand, exists precisely to be kept in case of a no-reason pull-out: that's its job. In both cases the relationship rule holds: €120 of advance on twelve people doesn't repay a lost regular. A good middle ground is the voucher: money not refunded but valid for a future dinner — the message is “we want to see you again,” not “we're keeping your money.”
Frequently asked questions
- Is an advance required by law?
- No: nobody forces you to ask for one and nobody forces the customer to give one. It's a practice based on agreement between you and the customer, and it holds as long as it's clear up front — amount, purpose and what happens if someone misses. If you want to use it in a structured way, one short written line in the confirmation is enough.
- Advance or deposit?
- For a restaurant, almost always the advance: it's simpler to explain, it stays the customer's money and ends up in the bill, so it creates less friction. The deposit has stronger guarantee value but needs better explaining and more careful handling. Many venues use the word deposit incorrectly: use the right one for what you actually do.
- How do I collect it on WhatsApp?
- With a payment link in the confirmation chat: the customer taps, pays and gets the confirmation — no bank transfers to check, no cash to register. That's how HousemanAI does it: it asks for the deposit at the right moment, sends the link and flags who hasn't paid yet before the evening.